Chinese Surprises

August 23, 2013

–       crotchless pants for babies (yep, you imagine correctly). Logically that doesn’t make any sense to you because you most likely do not just allow your child to pee wherever that child is. Sidewalk, park, middle of Ikea, in a restaurant, classroom, in the elevator, on your shoes.

–       the sun only exists between 5:30am and 7:30pm

–       Subway shipped straight from the US. Shockingly not quite so fresh when it gets here.

–       How long everyone in a household with one western toilet can have diarrhea

–       Rice Krispies for $17USD

–       How loud little women (everyone) can be when they talk on the phone.

–       How hard you will laugh at Duck Dynasty on a lazy Friday night. The constants are nice.



February 13, 2012

So JoeJoe and I have decided to stay in our current dogless house for another year. Actually we decided to buy a car and then by default decided to stay in the house. And really that’s not the whole story either, we decided to sell my beloved beetlebug AND THEN bought a new car (kind of on a whim which is the worst kind of purchase but so good so far) AND THEN decided to stay in our dogless house. 

Why is our house dogless? Its not in our contract. When we signed the lease this was not a huge issue but then (that whole story above) and now we’re staying. The silver lining: I’m finally allowed to nest (cheaply of course). 

Second long story: When we first moved into this house, I had all of these grand and magnificent plans to make the very first house that I have ever been solely in control of an Ana special. You know a la “I’ve been dreaming of my wedding since I was born” except more like “I’ve been fighting with my mother on how to decorate her house all my life and now that I have my own I can decorate it as I’ve always dreamed.” Except for the fact that Joey (after living in basically a [christian {whatever the heck that means}]) frat house, has developed his own opinion on housing decor. However when we moved in, all of my grandiose plans were deemed a. too expensive, b. not worth it for a rental that we’d only been in for a year. NOW, we’re going to be here for another year. SO: we agreed that I can nest! And that we will remain dogless for one more year.

All of that to say that I have almost completely convinced Joey to build me floating shelves! Yea, I’m not the best at getting to the point. Good thing the readership of this blog is 0! 

Enjoy the rest of your weekend! I’m going to spend it pinning floating shelves on pinterest! And by that I mean studying for my huge big ginormous test. No, but really.

Alright its time for me to stop.


February 8, 2012

Are you one of those people who don’t get sick very often but when you do it completely takes you out? I am too (I think)! Now for those of you who know me, I get nauseous all the time (not pregnant people, stop jumping to conclusions) but nothing ever comes out of it. Now before you go accusing my tummy of being weak, let me tell you that my stomach is just a bit of a diva all. the. dang. time. 

So unfortunately for me, its been revolting all week long. Reason: I have the 24 hour flu that has lasted for 48 hours!

Basically I’m using this post to complain.


Not sorry.

I’m suffering and isn’t suffered writing supposed to be inspiring or something?

So here’s to you and this inspired post.


New Years Resolutions

January 6, 2012

Well being that this is my second post this year, I have already achieved my New Year’s Resolution to blog more. Now I can slack for the rest of the year.

Sad news: I’m selling my car. Kind of feels like I’m sending my kid to boarding school. Or something a little less extreme. Point: I’m fairly disappointed. Who says Beetle Bugs aren’t family cars anyways?

News: In contrast to what that last paragraph may lead you to believe, I am not pregnant. I’m going to repeat it one more time. I am not pregnant. I’m selling my car because I’m responsible. At least if selling your car makes you more grown up then I am.

Old News: I still can’t cook. Which may be an issue since one cannot live on bread alone. Pinterest was supposed to help me with that but instead it just got me addicted. According to my Foodie board on Pinterest though, I am a phenomenal cook and further, I am quite the food connoisseur. Interesting how the internet paints a somewhat completely untrue picture of people.

Fun News: I am about 4 episodes away from being caught up on How I Met Your Mother which used to be one of my favorite shows. It has been replaced with Impractical Jokes which causes my hubby and I to roll on the floor in laughter. Totally worth the waiting up for. (We are early to bed kind of people. Don’t judge. Sleep is good.)

The end. I might see you next year.

New Years!

January 3, 2012

I decided to write a blog post after an.entire.year.and.a.half because they make me laugh, and isn’t that really just the point anyways? To enjoy yourself? The funny thing about writing is that while you are writing to (supposedly) an audience, you are really the only one who gets your own jokes.

New Years is always a let down. You either are freezing your tushy off in an overcrowded city square or you’re at a party you wish you’d had the guts not to go to and you just sit there waiting for the ball to drop so that you can countdown and get the heck to bed.

At least in my case that is.

The exception was this past New Years. We celebrated with friends by going to an Asian buffet (where I promptly stuffed 6 pieces of sushi in my mouth upon entry) and then talked about nothing until all of a sudden it was 11:45 and New Years Eve was almost over. BEST NEW YEARS EVER.

I was stuffed, I was happy and I didn’t spend the whole night waiting for it to be over. #success

New Years Resolutions:

Read the Word way more. I’m talking like desperation more.

Blog more – I’m not specifying how often because you and I both know it won’t be regular and I don’t want to set myself up for failure. Big dreams here people.

Put up more Slope Side Videos – again not saying how often. I am one who knows herself well. And herself is not the most consistent person when it comes to posting.

Try one new recipe per month – that is definitely a goal I can achieve. Sidenote: I count a new kind of tea as making a new recipe. Stop judging, I’m not like all those other bloggers. This blog is for those who can commiserate in the strength it takes to pin over 500 (real talk) recipes to your Foodie board on Pinterest over the last 8 months and actually making 5 (count ’em). Sidenote #2: Not a single one of those turned out on the first try. This is what the rest of the world is like all you people who just throw some stuff in a pot and next thing you know are pulling a souffle out of the oven. We call ourselves closet foodies and our experience with food is extensively restaurant based. We are proud of our ability to name off interesting ingredients and depend on you to make something with them. (I need to be a judge on Top Chef).

One of my resolutions was to take a picture every day but its January 3rd and I already skipped yesterday so that’s out.

What are your resolutions? Has anyone out there ever actually held a resolution to the next year?

Here’s to New Years! Here’s to you and here’s to me and here’s to all our broken resolutions. May they rest in peace.

January 24, 2011

Dear Winter,

You have outdone yourself this year. I just am so impressed that not only are you able to maintain frigid temperatures, but you even managed to throw down some snowflakes this morning. From frosted to iced car windows and beautiful sun mixed with tundra winds, you are just going all out this year. You’ve done a wonderful job of encouraging my hot tea habit and for that I thank you. Your wind blows so excitedly through our apartment windows and whenever we open the door, there you are waiting to come in! What a blessing to have such a friendly neighbor and house guest! I would wish you the best for your trip up north but I fear that you have become so addicted to sweet tea that it will be difficult for you to say goodbye. Please do have an enjoyable season,


Frozen One

December 23, 2010

To all of you,

This season,

may you celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.

may you sing songs of cheer.

but preferably not songs about cheer.

may you enjoy your time with your family and friends.

may those friends not include the characters from the Christmas Story.

may you spend this time smiling and laughing and eating definitely.

but please laugh a lot if you do break your christmas eating record.

may you not gain 10 pounds but if you do, may those 10 pounds be worth it.

may your days be filled with snow.

or not snow.

but definitely not rain.

may you spend nights sitting by the fire drinking apple cider.

or sitting by the tv drinking coca cola. your call.

may your family avoid temper tantrums and enjoy time together.

or at least avoid temper tantrums.

may your turkey be perfect.

and may you have bought it in a grocery store and not hauled it from the woods.

may you eat many many cookies.

or chocolate. it really doesn’t matter.

may your fudge turn out as great as ours did.

may you not talk about food as much as I do.

but may you enjoy it like I do.

may you have better luck finding Christmas movies than we are.

just have a good time alright guys!

Merry Christmas to you and yours from me and mine. Cheers!

October 8, 2010

Do you know what it means to be dependent on Christ alone? Do you know what it means to put Him first, to have Him on the forefront of your mind, to depend on Him when you’re sad, happy, terrified, excited? Do you know what its like to tell Him first what’s going on in your life? To have Him be the first one you turn to in crisis or drama or delight? To be dependent on Him means that you thirst for Him. A couple of years ago, my church went through a series that was based on Psalm 63:8 :

‘My soul clings to you;
       your right hand upholds me.’

The premise was Following Hard After God. Does your soul cling to Him? Are you desperate to know Him more? You know Him more through spending more time with Him, through making Him the most important thing in your life. What’s the most important thing in your life? Often your significant other is at the top of the list, your family, your friends, a sport you play, class work, your job that doesn’t quite end when you leave the office, and then way down at the bottom, even beneath working out, we find spend time with the LORD. The One whose right hand upholds us is the one who we throw down to the end of our to do list? There is a disconnect in this world where we think that its ok to avoid God until we’re desperate and then run at Him in need of His touch. How great is our God that even when we’ve ignored Him until we simply can’t anymore, He still welcomes us with open arms. If we would just stop ignoring Him and start investing time in the only eternal relationship, we would know what it means to cling to Him. Please don’t allow yourself to become complacent in this matter as well. When you’re talking God, you’re talking the difference between life and death. Please don’t choose the easy way out. Don’t turn your back on God every 2 weeks between your crises. Its not worth it to have to play catch up. Build your relationship with Him from the get go and enjoy getting to know Him. He deserves to be first, He demands to be first and whether you do daily or not ‘The heaven’s declare the glory of God.’

October 6, 2010

Do you know what it means to be saved? I do!

I literally feel that I have been narrowly saved from death.. probably because I have. You know that feeling when you’re standing on the edge of a cliff? Or even close to the edge and as soon as you walk away there’s that instant feeling of relief? Ok good. Now think about having yourself pulled away from the very very edge by Him who is able to do more than we can ever say or imagine. At that point you can’t help but know that you’ve been saved from death for a purpose. Tonight the LORD used somebody to stir my heart and push me past the fear that was keeping me from truly having His Son live in my heart. Am I ashamed it took me this long? No. I don’t know why it did but if there is one thing that I have heard over and over it is that God has a plan for my life. And now I know for certain that I am His and He is mine and I will be going to heaven to worship His Name forever. Do you know what it means to be saved? I do because someone had the courage to stand and tell their story. When was the last time you stood for your faith? Mediocrity is not celebrated in the world, why should it be celebrated in the church? I would like to refuse to be mediocre in my walk with Christ but I know I can’t do that by myself.. I’m too much of a closet slacker! However this is how great God is and this is how I can refuse myself and instead follow Christ in everything I do:

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Ephesians 3:20-22

Please don’t be afraid to step out in boldness whether you know Him or you need to. Don’t be afraid; His power is at work within you.

I hope this encourages you. I have never felt more encouraged myself than tonight. I have the greatest fiance, the greatest family and the greatest friends. I’m praying for my readers that there are people in your life who are unafraid to speak of God’s work in their lives and that there are people who love you. Don’t stand on your own strength; let Him lift you.


His daughter.

and mrs jcm to be.

September 27, 2010

Today I went on one of my favourite (this spelling is for Canadians) and one of my least favorite (this spelling is for all ya’ll americans) sites. The duh duh duuuuuuuhhhhhhh. And this is what was awaiting me:

Lets just take a moment and ponder this.

First: 291 days! Woo Woo Woo!

Second: Apparently there are 362 things to do on my wedding to do list.

Third: 45 of them are overdue.

Oh gosh. This is beginning to sound like the library ladies every time I go in there. ‘Excuse me child but you have one book overdue.’ Well yes ma’am I do. Why? Because  I’m not finished reading. It is so great how well that answer applies to the Knot’s little welcome surprise. This is how I feel about wedding checklists:

Why can’t we talk about fun things like this great idea I’ve had for the centerpieces at the reception? And by great idea I had I mean great idea I found on a really great wedding blog. Or why can’t we talk about the amazing dessert we picked? Believe me, that is a great discussion to have. This wedding to do list is starting to look like my planner. Lots of things I don’t really want to do and lots and lots of homework.

Something I’m stoked about? JCM and I are going to meet with our CSER tonight which is going to be with the Special Olympics of Virginia! For everyone non-LU, CSER is the volunteer hours that everyone above freshman status at LU must complete every semester. You know just more LU stuff.

Things I’m excited about this week:

My little bro is coming to visit me! I’m going to cook all this gluten free stuff… hahahahha. Well I’m going to try anyways.

No more homework. Hahahhaahhahahaaha. Oh that is a funny one.

A healed knee. Hahahahahhahahahaha. I am cracking myself up today.

291 days heck yea!

Yours, Mrs JCM to be